Disappointed

Runners come in all shapes, sizes and speeds. We are one of the most unique groups of people I have ever been able to call myself a part of, and that is one of the things I love about us. The community of runners I have found in the blog world is a group of accepting, caring, encouraging people who have a shared passion for this crazy thing we all do.

For the most part, I have experienced the same thing when I line up for a race. I am surrounded by people skinnier, fatter, shorter, taller, older, younger. Yet here we all are, united by running. And although I am often a little intimidated, the feeling has always been created within myself and never as a result of the people around me.

I realize we are all human and have different personalities and insecurities, but I was still disappointed when I heard the conversation going on between two women in front of me in the port-a-potty line at my last race. They were taking turns making fun of a woman in the line next to us. Fortunately they were quiet enough that the woman couldn't hear them, but I could. And it made me sad. And mad.

I had noticed the woman in the other line as well. We were on the same bus up to the start. The reason I noticed her was because I was thinking how cute her hair looked in pigtails and thinking I should try that, except my hair is probably too long to look cute or be functional that way, but she can pull it off and she is at least twenty years older than me, but maybe I should cut my hair before I try it, and yada, yada, yada.

I realize some people make fun of others because they themselves are insecure. I admit I probably fall into this category sometimes, yet I try to keep my thoughts to myself or vent to my husband in private. Others do it because they actually think they are better than other people. Whatever the reason, I was disappointed in these women. If you have to rip other people apart, save it for your "friends" at book club or girls night out. Don't bring it to the race. We are runners. We are better than that.


RUN: I am on the hunt for the perfect headband. I am tired of buying a pack of three "sport" headbands at the grocery store and then fiddling with them over and over again during my runs and then needing to replace them every few months because they stretch out. The only reason I keep buying them is because they are cheap. So if I am going to spend $10-15 on one headband, I want it to be awesome. Let me know if you have any recommendations!

Three Things Thursday - Photo Edition

1. The Princess started preschool on Monday. She literally couldn't have been more excited. Some of the excitement had to do with her new clothes. While the Princess was at school, I took advantage of the cooler temps and the chance to push the single jogger and took my little Bean on a run. While running, she looked up at me from the jogger at least a dozen times and asked, "Sissy?"

2. I told you my pictures from the Hobble Creek Half would probably show exactly how I felt. Here's the proof:

This was the best smile I could manage when I saw the photographer.

3. I've had some great runs since my Hobble Creek learning experience. I ran an easy three on Monday and another slightly faster three yesterday, both with the single jogger. On Tuesday, I got in some cross training on the bike and some HARD core.

While she does miss her sister, I think my Bean enjoys her single jogger runs. This was how she kicked back in her jammies and made the most of it last night. And yes, she now has an orange and yellow cast. Her sister wasn't there to influence her to choose pink or purple, and she was determined that it be orange and yellow.

RUN: Planning on six miles on the treadmill while the girls nap today. And I am trying to figure out how to get a 16-miler done either tomorrow or Saturday without the hubby here since he will be hunting. Somehow I will get it done.

Fun = FAIL

You know how they say the memory of the pain of childbirth fades quickly, otherwise women would never have more than one child? I never really understood that. I loved giving birth to my girls. It wasn't easy and it hurt like a son-of-a-gun, but I loved every minute of it. I am wondering, however, if that same idea might apply in the case of races. If so, maybe I will run the Hobble Creek Half again. Otherwise, I probably won't.

I'm sure you can guess that accomplishing my one goal to have fun was a big fat FAIL. All that stuff we read and people say about how much running is a mental sport is TRUE. I had a lousy attitude from the time we sat on the bus seven miles from the start for more than 30 minutes and it became obvious the race would start late again (it began about an hour late last year). Then I listened to a conversation in the port-a-potty line that added to my grumpiness (more on that in a later post). Once the race finally started, I spent way too much time being annoyed about the late start and the heat. Also the thought that I would be presented with a carnation at the end was not pushing me along. I kept thinking if I'm going to pay to run 13.1 miles, I want a medal!! You might be starting to understand my mindset as I ran.

As I started the race, my Garmin couldn't find the satellite so the only data it tracked was my time. I wanted to stick to around 10 minute miles so I could count the race as a "planned marathon pace" long run. At the exact moment I passed the ten mile marker, my watch gave me the 1:40:00 alert. The last three miles were about the same, but I don't know exactly because I made a 5+ minute potty stop just after I hit 10 miles. I kept putting off stopping because there was always a line, but I finally didn't want to wait anymore. So if you figure in my bathroom break and the fact that I forgot to stop my Garmin right as I crossed the finish, I was right on my target pace. The G-man was at 2:18:17 when I finally stopped it. My chip time was 2:17:55. When I looked at the results, I had to remind myself I didn't race and I ran this same race last year in 2:00:42.

Here are some other random thoughts about the race...

• I would rather have a medal than a shirt.
• I walked through all the aid stations.
• I was more critical of how this race was managed because I was able to compare it to the two other half marathons I ran this year.
• I was sick the past two weeks and almost didn't race at all. I got a virus a few days ago that caused me to get sores on my throat, made the roof of my mouth swell and had me running a fever Thursday night. Just another factor in how I felt on race day.
• I saw Alicia before the race started. I was bummed that I didn't see her again after the race though. I hope I can talk her into joining me for a run soon!
• I never used my energy gel. My stomach was a little grumpy off and on, so I didn't dare put anything in it. Oddly though, my stomach didn't bother me at all after the race. I went home and ate lunch and didn't spent any time in the bathroom. Maybe I am finally figuring out how to fuel and my body is starting to appreciate the pre- and post-race Imodium.
• The guy who passed me singing along to his iPod made me smile. I wasn't ornery all 13.1 miles.
• I need to move somewhere flat. As someone who struggles with IT band issues, all these downhill races are not the best. My left leg bothered me off and on, and it was pretty angry by the time I got home. I've been spending some quality time with the foam roller.
• I didn't get a pre- or post-race photo of myself, and I'm sure the race photos will show me looking about how I felt, so we'll have to see whether or not I share them on here. I did get a picture on my phone on my way home though, and it made me smile. I'm pretty sure my girls are going to want me to go running every weekend so "Aunt" Stacey can come play with them. She dressed them up like princesses, painted their finger and toenails, did princess hair, put make-up on them and even decorated The Bean's cast. Stacey really is amazing. I don't know what I would do without her (and not just because she is my go-to girl when I have a race)!

RUN: Friday night as I set my alarm and my husband set his (for more than an hour before mine so he could go try to shoot Bambi), I commented that we are both nuts to voluntarily do activities that require us to get up so early.

Getting Ready to Run

What did I do today?

First I finished charging my Garmin. Then I uploaded a few new songs on iTunes. Next I'll plug in my cute little pink iPod Shuffle, load the new songs and get it charged. Also on my to-do list: pick and set out my clothes, eat my usual dinner, try to get to bed early, and of course pick up my bib. Tomorrow is race day. 13.1 miles. The Hobble Creek Half Marathon.

With no time goal and no pressure, I have hardly thought about this race at all. It is sort of a weird feeling. I have thought about it so little, in fact, that I literally forgot about picking up my race packet until I started writing this. With my marathon six weeks from tomorrow, I am running this race strictly as a training run. My only goal is to have fun.

Clocks, crushes and cremation

A few weeks ago, I received The Versatile Blogger award from Deanna at Miles to Run.

As part of the award, I am supposed to share seven things about myself, so here goes...

1. My shirts are hung up and organized by color. My spices are alphabetized.


2. I want to be cremated. I have strong feelings about this, and I've had several lengthy conversations with friends and relatives about this.


3. I collect clocks. This is a picture of my favorite clock. It was also one of the first in my collection.


4. I 've had a crush on Bruce Willis ever since I saw him in a play at a theater in Sun Valley, Idaho.


5. I love to snow ski and water ski but I haven't done either since having kids.


6. I don't have a middle name. My daughters don't have middle names either.


7. I tried to talk my husband into taking my last name. He didn't, so I considered keeping my maiden name. Now I'm glad I took his last name.

I am also supposed to pass the award on to seven other bloggers. The lucky winners are:

1. J @ Morning Runner
2. Christina @ Lace It Up and Run
3. Whitney @ It's What Moves Me
4. Lisa @ 110 Pounds and Counting
5. P @ Adventures of an Average Athlete
6. KK @ Running Through Life
7. Heather @ The Crazy World of a Running Mom

RUN: Ran 10 miles on the treadmill yesterday. The highlight of the run (other than the 4 miles I got to watch Bolt with my girls) was running to Aerosmith's Sweet Emotion. (And I am not as old as the song might suggest; it was released before I was even born.) You should seriously consider adding it to your running playlist.

A Run With My Girls

First she took pictures while I ran...

Then she ran...

Then her sister wanted to run but was a little hesitant...

But she couldn't resist...

And she was very proud of herself when she was finished!

RUN: I told The Princess this could be our last double jogger run because they are getting too big and it's getting harder to push them. She told me: "I won't tell my kids it is the last time because I am a good mom to my babies and I am stronger than you." Well okay then.

Bugged

I read an article about Julia Roberts' weight gain while filming Eat Pray Love. It was an interesting article, other than one little part that bugged me:

"Julia, who has maintained her slim physique while juggling a high-profile
career and being the mom of three, managed to train for a 13.5-mile half
marathon while shooting the film in India last summer."

13.5?? Really??


RUN: Honey Stinger Cherry Blossom Energy Chews are awesome. I haven't been able to stomach any kind of energy chew before, but these are like eating fruit snacks ~ very tasty fruit snacks!

Falling in Love Again

You may have noticed I recently took a break. I came home from Arizona and spent several days feeling utterly overwhelmed by life. When I looked at my life, I felt like I was failing in every way possible - as a mom, professionally, in my running, in managing my home, blogging, you name it. After a few days wallowing in hopelessness, I decided to make some changes. I set some personal goals, typed them up and posted them next to my bed. Then I decided I needed to change the way I think. I will never feel totally successful at the end of the day unless I stop beating myself up about everything. Like missing a run, or getting behind on the laundry, or getting impatient with my daughter when she won't clean her room, or not commenting on every blog I read. I spent time prioritizing my life and reminding myself what is really important.

I also realized too many things in my life are things I feel I need to do or should do rather than want to do. Running has become one of those things. I have been logging the miles because my training plan says I should, but I haven't looked forward to running for a while now. I want to fall back in love with running. So with nine weeks until the St. George marathon, I took my training plan down and decided it is time to run just to run.