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Tuesday, November 23, 2010

A Runner in Need

When I last posted, my little Bean was sick. A week before that, the hubs and I got a call from the babysitter while we were out to dinner letting us know The Princess had thrown up. Then last night, a week after Bean recovered from her 48-hour bug, she puked three times. Needless to say, we have been doing lots of laundry, steam cleaning carpets, and disinfecting things the past few weeks. However, with our latest round of puke, we have an added adventure. The washing machine isn't working. So there is a mound of vomit-covered laundry waiting for the repairman to come work his magic this afternoon. Bean's bumper pad and my comforter, however, are too big for the washer and need a visit to the laundromat. I'm hoping the repairman is speedy because there is a blizzard warning for this afternoon. Life is never dull!

Now on to non-puke related things. Because we are part of one of the most amazing groups of people in the world, I need your help. One of our fellow runner(d)s needs a little love and advice. Here is her dilemma, in her own words:

"Why is it that some husbands just don't 'get it' about the feelings you get when you run?! Mine is such pain in the a--. He just doesn't 'get' the adrenaline rush that I feel when I run and the excitement. He thinks it is all bologna! So hard to be married to someone who doesn't feel your enjoyment in an activity that you enjoy so much :( "

So if you can empathize, sympathize or offer her words of encouragement or advice, please share. I will be sure to pass all your comments on to her. Plus, I'm sure she isn't the only one out there struggling with this, so your comments could be far-reaching.

Hopefully I will be back tomorrow to share my thoughts about and goals for Thursday's Turkey Trot 5K, but just in case ... Happy Thanksgiving and good luck to all you Turkey Day runners!!

15 comments:

  1. So sorry about your puke-o-rama life right now! Hope it is all behind you soon.

    Can't help your friend--I am lucky enough to have a supportive spouse!

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  2. yikes! hopefully everyone will be on the mend soon!

    My husband is a fellow runner too, so I don't know how much advise I can offer. Maybe if her husband has something he loves and gets him really jazzed she can try to show him how exercise does that for her?

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  3. Have your friend equate the runner's high to the happy high he gets when his favorite football team wins on the last play of the game.

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  4. Oh, no - poor Bean! Poor Mama! :(

    I wish I had some advice for your friend, but I don't. I guess I can't understand one spouse not supporting another even if they don't enjoy the same things. I don't understand why my husband is obsessed with golf, but I absolutely support his need to go and play.

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  5. Glad your family is in capable hands while they are ill.

    Am I really the only other runner that can identify with this situation? Really? Well, my hubbs struggles with of all things, jealousy (mostly) about my running. He does try to be tolerant/supportive but usually (after all these years) leaves me feeling quilty for wanting a hour a day of my own life. That's after I give every other hour to taking care of our family.
    However, I do understand that a runner's lifestyle is not for everyone. And as the years pass sometimes interests change (my husband used to like to run shorter distances). I do think it takes conversation to help eachother understand the things that are important and fundamental to eachother. My hubbs trys to understand that I need to run most everyday and I try and make sure that I make time for him alone each day even if it's just for an adult conversation without kids climbing on us.
    Your spouse doesn't need to love running, he just needs to love that you love running.

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  6. I think that pile of pukey laundry would send me over the edge and I would just end up adding to the puke! So sorry your washing machine isn't working to top it all off!
    As for your friend... I have a really supportive spouse but there are times when he's said to me that all our vacations don't have to revolve around races. I think it helps to points out the benefits that he and the family receives from her running (happier mom, stress reliever, healthy spouse...) And it might help to just not worry that he doesn't get it. I run for me and not for anyone else. It helps to have a running partner that "gets it" or the blogging community that understands the lunacy. And lastly, I like that not everyone gets the rush. I like that people think I'm crazy for running 26.2 miles or running in freezing cold weather or in the pouring rain. I like that I'm out there doing something that not everyone does. And I know that if they would just give it a shot, they would be hooked too! Maybe not overnight, but it seems to be an inevitability!

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  7. I had a similar situation. My boyfriend didn't understand racing and the nervousness/anticipation/stress I had leading up to a race. His response was "why race if it does this to you?" Then he participated in his own race (on a bike) and finally understood!

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  8. Glad the puke-fest is over and done - hopefully!!!

    Sorry about your friend's husband..seems to me there's a bit of envy there and I bet he totally "gets it" but maybe insecurity is preventing him for embracing the wife. I've seen that and it's just too dang bad!!

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  9. Sorry about your puke adventure.

    I fully understand your issue with your husband. I have the same issue with my wife sometimes. She doesn't understand all of the runs and why I get the way I do when I don't run or a run goes bad. Sometimes I walk on eggshells when I know I will be gone for 3+ hours and she is busy.

    But..... many times she understands as well :)

    I hope to get some ideas as well :)

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  10. Shelly said what I was going to say. Even if your friend took up basket weaving . . . he needs to be supportive. It's hard. I KNOW! The PITA was NOT always as supportive as he is today. [how do you think he got the name "PITA"?! ;) ]. She needs to just do it for herself until he can see her passion. What I did that worked . . . I didn't talk about my run[s] with him. I ran. I finished. I was happy. day after day after day. Then one day he started talking to me about it. asking questions. I only ever answered what he asked. never more. Now I have the most amazing support in him that a woman coould ask for. Took 3 years. worth every day.

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  11. Sorry to hear about your friend's husband. I tried to get my hubby interested in running with me. Even bought him a great pair of shoes. He was in the Army, and running just reminds him of that experience - he can't move on from it! So, I just have had to accept it. He does come to my half marathon runs for support - I really appreciate that. I've learned that we just have to accept some things in life - hopefully he makes up for it in other ways!

    I'm a first time visitor! Love your blog!

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  12. Several of the comments had great advice. He doesn't have to love running, he just has to get that she does. It's also good to try and give him an example of something he loves that she doesn't.

    Its hard when a spouse isn't supportive. Tell her to try and be patient when dealing with this. Being calm and non-confrontational about it will only help.

    Winks & Smiles,
    Wifey

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  13. For your friend (the runner in need):
    The easier advice: change husband.
    2nd advice: put yourselves in front of the mirror and show how you (wife) are in shape and he (husband) overweight.
    3rd advice: don't listen his complaints and run.
    4th advice: no run no sex
    .....to be continued in case.....

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  14. I hate when it seems like everything is not working out!! I hope the kids get better soon!

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  15. Thank you all for your advice. I think we have come to a common ground now. Sheila

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